My last post was in April 2014 I think. That's 2 years back. But I am back here writing a post. There's only one reason why I would start writing (after a big break) - love. Lot of things happened between my last post and today. A lot of things.
I read a lot of books. That's why I couldn't write much. I fell in love, again. And this time, hard. And today, as I'm writing this post, I can feel all of the world's emotions and hollow at the same time. I have become silent. I was always silent, but now more than ever. I hardly talk to anyone. Not even my parents. I'm out of home most of the time. I leave home at 7 and return at 10 at night. By the time I come back home, I am emotionally and physically drained and tired to talk to anyone. Emotions in me have started dying slowly each day. Slowly and slowly, I feel less emotions every day. And I'm not complaining.
So coming back to the reason I'm writing this post. She's like sunshine. I love her, a lot. And today, we are on the verge of a break up. We have said some things to each other - hurtful I guess. And we are both offended. I am sorry for this and I feel very bad. She's offended, and hurt. And I'm the reason for this. I never wanted to be the reason for her pain. She said she doesn't want to talk to me. And wont even meet me. I don't know what to do. I apologized. But she's too hurt to listen. I feel like a part of me is paralyzed. I have been feeling low past few days, but now more than ever. I feel hollow. I don't want to live without her. I love her so much. I need her. I know these the most cliché things to say, but I don't know what else to say. I hope she accepts my apology.
It all started a few months ago. I saw her for the first time and she walked right past me like I am crowd and she's a skyscraper. Her eyes scanning the crowd and coming on to me. I cant forget the moment where our eyes found each other and then disappeared in to the crowd again.
She looks both ways before gently whispering I love you to me under her breath. And when she hugs me, her eyes scan the empty room as if the walls have eyes and the ears and mouth could give me away.
When I'm curled up in her arms with mismatched breaths, I wonder how can someone who carries a mountain on his shoulders could crumble so easily in her arms.
During dark, she'll run her fingers over my fingers like she's trying to read words carved on my skin.
I'll stare God right in the eye and tell him that if loving her was a sin then I want no place in heaven with Him because the way her lips fit perfectly on mine and the way her fingers fit perfectly in mine is a type of paradise I'll never forget.
I read a lot of books. That's why I couldn't write much. I fell in love, again. And this time, hard. And today, as I'm writing this post, I can feel all of the world's emotions and hollow at the same time. I have become silent. I was always silent, but now more than ever. I hardly talk to anyone. Not even my parents. I'm out of home most of the time. I leave home at 7 and return at 10 at night. By the time I come back home, I am emotionally and physically drained and tired to talk to anyone. Emotions in me have started dying slowly each day. Slowly and slowly, I feel less emotions every day. And I'm not complaining.
So coming back to the reason I'm writing this post. She's like sunshine. I love her, a lot. And today, we are on the verge of a break up. We have said some things to each other - hurtful I guess. And we are both offended. I am sorry for this and I feel very bad. She's offended, and hurt. And I'm the reason for this. I never wanted to be the reason for her pain. She said she doesn't want to talk to me. And wont even meet me. I don't know what to do. I apologized. But she's too hurt to listen. I feel like a part of me is paralyzed. I have been feeling low past few days, but now more than ever. I feel hollow. I don't want to live without her. I love her so much. I need her. I know these the most cliché things to say, but I don't know what else to say. I hope she accepts my apology.
It all started a few months ago. I saw her for the first time and she walked right past me like I am crowd and she's a skyscraper. Her eyes scanning the crowd and coming on to me. I cant forget the moment where our eyes found each other and then disappeared in to the crowd again.
She looks both ways before gently whispering I love you to me under her breath. And when she hugs me, her eyes scan the empty room as if the walls have eyes and the ears and mouth could give me away.
When I'm curled up in her arms with mismatched breaths, I wonder how can someone who carries a mountain on his shoulders could crumble so easily in her arms.
During dark, she'll run her fingers over my fingers like she's trying to read words carved on my skin.
I'll stare God right in the eye and tell him that if loving her was a sin then I want no place in heaven with Him because the way her lips fit perfectly on mine and the way her fingers fit perfectly in mine is a type of paradise I'll never forget.
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